One of my favorite things about vacation is the sense of freedom I get from being away from “work.” As a full-time domestic engineer, I sleep where I work. I eat where I work. I relax where I work. When I am at home, I always have this nagging sense of things that I need to do…my closet is a mess, the study needs organizing, the pictures need to be put in albums, the photos on the computer need backing up, the “scary” bowl needs dumping out, the garden needs to be weeded, etc., etc., etc. There is no way that everything is all done ever. The pantry, the girls’ closets, the playroom shelves all call to me of things not quite done…projects unfinished.
Don’t misunderstand; I am quite capable of ignoring all of those projects when I am at home. In fact, I mostly do ignore them in the business and distraction of life. But they are always there and, truth be told, I often feel guilty about the things left undone…those projects and tasks that I plan to get to “when I have time.” But, while I am here, 1300 miles from home, I can’t hear them calling. Clearly, they can wait until I return. So here, I read all I want, sleep all I want, visit with my loved ones all I want without the tyranny of the urgent things that are not quite done yet…the project that I really “should” do. No guilt…no sense of being pulled in different directions.
Those of us who choose to make our homes and families our full-time work need to learn to release ourselves from the unattainable goal of perfection…that just like our husbands and friends who work outside of the home, we must allow ourselves the freedom to walk away from the job that is not quite finished. That for today, what is done is enough. Unless I can learn to do that, I can never truly enjoy those “sabbath” moments in my home anymore than my husband can truly find respite and relaxation in his office. Then our homes can be the sanctuaries they are meant to be.
Hmmm, something to think more about….
